Living with Chronic Illness — New Treatment — A 30 Minute Life

A new diagnosis has led to some new treatment. This post shares my experience of the first few days since I heard the news.

As I wrote in my last post, my symptoms are getting worse. Waking up as tired as I was when I slept and seeing every slope as an Alpine ascent. Last Thursday I visited with my Neurologist, and after discussing the changes he concluded I now have Secondary Progressive Multiple Sclerosis. This means cycles of good and bad will stop, replaced by a never-ending decline. It might be fast, or slow, but constant.

My head went into a tailspin on the way home. Tiredness made the fatigue worse because I had to get out of bed 2 hours earlier to arrive on time. Tiredness has a way of making the simplest of crises something of mammoth proportions. Visions of wheelchairs, hoists, 24-hour care in some soulless institution. Thoughts careering around my head like dodgems with death wish teenagers at the wheel.

Arriving Home

After arriving home, I sat outside the back of the house, and let the sun burn away the negativity. Time with my thoughts, the blank pages of my journal the new home for the ashes left behind. Cleansed, purged of anxiety about my future, I could now focus on regaining equilibrium. By focusing inward I lost all connection with the…